I am a stereotype: Mormon Stay at Home Mom

Alright- let's be honest. Being a stay at home mom is a whole lot of each of these. I have received a few comments about why I don't work. I kindly reply and then think- what business is it of yours? Why do you work? 

First off, I have to applaud Mom's that choose to work, Mom's that have to work, and especially single Mom's who do everything. Parenthood was never meant for one person. It is too involved and requires so much! I honestly don't know how women be a Mom, a wife, and work outside the home. I tend my nephew 4-5 days a week, and have 1 easy baby of my own, and I am busy. 

"Busy from son up, til son down!!" 

No seriously though, I am extremely busy! My days are always full of dishes, laundry, all the boring house work. Cooking and shopping. I also tend my yard and garden, which is a lot of work but very satisfying. I have raspberries, hollyhocks, carrots, beets, beans, corn, tomatoes, and squash in my back yard, and tons of flowers finally filling in my front. It has taken me 5 years of cultivating to get this flowerbed filled in nicely.

 Part of the yard work is battling these damn gophers.

  

We play lots and lots, and read lots and lots. We practice ABC's and counting, and we sing silly songs and nursery rhymes. We play in the sprinklers, and play with the doggies. Sometimes we watch movies! Boys nap, and I use that time to work out. 

Sometimes we go on field trips: playdates with friends, planetarium, water park, park and picnics. 

 I have to acknowledge that I know I am extremely blessed to be able to stay home. It is my choice, and Daniel provides enough for our family to allow me to do so. I know that for many families, that it isn't possible.  

So down to the question, why don't I work?

I do. 

Also, I choose not to work outside the home because I want to be the one who teaches my children. I want to be the one who cheers them on, and who picks them up when they fall. I want to know that they have been taught values, principles, and manners. I want them to grow up knowing and feeling that I was always there for them. 

Staying home is also in many respects a spiritual choice. My faith doesn't require that I stay home, but certainly in situations that allow for a mother to stay home, that is preferred. Children learn gospel and spiritual principles in their own homes, and their natural tendencies for kindness and happiness are best fostered at home. 

“The most important work you and I will ever do will be within the walls of our own homes.” 

― Harold B. Lee

The things no one tells you about pregnancy and about marriage

If you really want to challenge a marriage- buy a car together.

If you really want to challenge a marriage- have pets.

If you really want to challenge a marriage- buy a house.

If you really want to challenge a marriage- have a baby.

If you really really want to upset the world- do all these things and...
-have depression
-have anxiety
-have a suitcase full of past baggage {a few items my suitcase includes: abused as a child, prescription          drug abuse, unladylike cursing,  and having multiple opinions that I share when I shouldn't}
-have OCD
-have a dysfunctional childhood

The list could go on, believe me.

Well, all I can say is bring it on- cause I have done everything and then some as mentioned above. Am I a sucker for contention and punishment? Sometimes by golly I think I must thrive on it!!!

I really feel like everyone lies about marriage and having babies. If everyone knew how hard it all really was, no one would do it!!

I try to reflect on the lessons I should be learning from my situation. What does Heavenly Father want of me, and how best do I handle the trials that come my way?

I have faith in God's timing. I know we are meant to be having this sweet baby at this time, but that doesn't mean that he comes without challenge.

Not necessarily by choice, we have been married 8 years without any kids. There are so many benefits to have gone this long in establishing our relationship and household that will aid us in raising our family. However- no one tells you that there are drawbacks!
The older you get, the more set in your ways you become- ESPECIALLY men- so when big changes come- ones that bring a huge responsibility- there is a certain amount of fear and frustration.
I get it! But I didn't make this baby all by myself!!

Pregnancy is hard. I really don't actually like it- but in the end, I am so grateful for the miracle that Heavenly Father sent to me. I pray constantly that this baby is healthy and good.

I pray daily that I can have patience to deal with people- especially Dan.

Just when you think you have it all figured out- it being marriage, love, family- that you are a real pro, you get tossed a curve ball.

What makes it even better, is that there are tons of people out there ready to shed light and advice on every conceivable situation that you encounter. Annoying!!

My best friend Sheri is wise and said- Everyone is an expert at marriage and parenthood- but they are only an expert in their personal situation- not everyone else's.

I'm over it- and the craziness inside my head

Okay. So I am a whiner. I'm sorry! If you read all these, then you must not mind too much! HA!
I am now in my 28th week. 10 weeks to go! CRAZY! I am over it though. I am ready to be done. I am still grateful for the experience, and I can't wait for the end result, but I miss my body and my sanity.
Everyone keeps saying to enjoy the pregnancy, because it is actually worse after! Um, I have decided to ignore the advice that trends that way.
I don't sleep- hardly at all. No Bueno. If I ever needed sleep in my entire life, right now is when I need it most!
I had a melt down last Sunday. I got all ready for church, but hadn't had any sleep, and I freaked out. Thanks to hormones and lack of sleep- Once I got over it, I told Dan- "I feel pretty useless, I can't do much, and when I do anything, it wipes me completely out. I am really grateful that I don't have to work- or that I don't really have any pressing obligations, because if I did, I bet crazy Cherish would surface." Crazy Cherish hasn't made an appearance for almost a year thankfully, and I'd like to keep it that way. I'm sure Dan would too.
He is really the sweetest and whenever we pray, he ALWAYS prays for me to get rest.
When I am up in the wee hours of the night- like now- my mind wanders and ponders all sorts of things.
One of the worries I have is: How on earth do we raise our kids in the world but not of the world- especially when it comes to technology? I know Dan's brain says "No cell phones 'til high school" and my brain wants to say that too. But- is that realistic?  How do you find balance in holding back but also giving responsibility without depriving their generation of what is essential?
Another worry creeping up is: {Warning-somewhat graphic content to follow} - I am TERRIFIED for labor and delivery. I am terrified about not being able to push the baby out, I am terrified of my private parts being torn and shredded apart! I am simply terrified! It continues to get closer, and I am scared. No joke. I am also scared of ever having sex that feels good again. Told you, graphic. But seriously- I am scared.
In the spirit of documentation- second trimester was totally better than the first. No morning sickness, and a tad bit more energy. As I am in the beginning of third trimester- new discomforts are creeping up. I am a total pansy I think. But the list of discomforts so far for this stage includes: fatigue, night sweats, lack of sleep, not being able to bend over, having Cameron right up in my ribs- ouch-, swelling down there and everywhere, restless legs and cramps, carpal tunnel, etc. See- whining. If I really could just sleep- I bet I would be able to ignore most of this list. And believe me people- I have had several talks with the doc, and tried everything safely possible. I just have to deal.
I LOVE feeling him move though- and it is the weirdest thing to actually "watch" and see him move in my tummy. He really loves it when I exercise, he gets the most active then or after we eat- especially my favorite- spaghetti/pasta.
I am seriously grateful that for a high risk pregnancy, I have had it relatively good and easy, and Cameron is developing appropriately. I won't be sad to give up daily shots of blood thinners though- and headaches and bed rest as needed.