All things toddler- Poop Issue- If you can't handle toddler poop stories, stop here.

In November and December, we seemed to have an abundance of poop where poop isn't supposed to be episodes.
There are two times that are worth documenting here- I will mention there were probably 10 more. It was disgusting.
The very first time- Jaxson was over and he and Cameron were bathing together.
Jaxson says to me, "Cherish, your bathtub is dirty!"
Me: "No it isn't buddy, it's just old."
Jaxson: "There is dirt in here!"
Me: Looks into the bathtub, "OH Jaxson! You are right! That is poop! Cameron must have just pooped in the tub!"
Jaxson: "Can I please get the heck out of here?!"
Me: "Yes, yes you can!"

The next episode- was kind of a blowout. The only reason it is worth documenting is because I captured the most mischievous picture.
Cameron had some tummy troubles, and had a full diaper, I told him we would get into the bathtub. I started the water and looked around for him, and to my surprise- he put himself fully clothed and poop all over into the tub. I thought for sure he was done- so I had rinsed and cleaned everything then got him back into the clean tub to actually bath him, and he pooped some more. I had stepped into the hall to grab a towel, and he was so disgusted by it, that he was scooping it out of the tub onto the floor.

Can I say I am so glad that part of our lives seems to have passed.....

Babbling cuss words

Everytime Cameron seems to get into a decent sleep groove, if we mention it or someone asks- it all goes down hill. He was making great strides in his sleep but lately he has been getting up every 3-4 hours again instead of every 5-7.
Last night was exceptionally difficult- from 2:30am on was a screaming, mad, baby babble and baby cuss words, on and off the rest of the morning! ROUGH! I couldn't figure out why- but after our morning was about done and we did lunch, he was ready for his nap and had a better rest of his day!

Have you ever seen such a face?! This guy has it rough!

Making a separation, and cutting out toxic people

After years of turning our cheek, holding back to keep the peace, and asking ourselves, "What would Jesus do?"
Also adding that after years of immaturity, defense, contention, anger, and hatred, Dan and I have decided to cut his sister from our lives completely- if for only a while.
I will add that we feel the Christlike way and peaceful way about it was all one sided- our side, and that the immature and selfish acts were from her as well as us.
Now that we have a son, so many of our opinions and focus has changed and we just feel it to be too dangerous and toxic to have him around a person who is constantly bringing down her entire family.

We looked to friendly advice and church resources for opinions and suggestions on this matter- as it is something we don't take lightly. We are hoping this isn't a permanent decision, but rather one to allow all in the family to collect their wits and thoughts and hopefully, eventually come to a happier place.

"Sometimes it makes sense to be sympathetic with toxic people whom you know are going through a difficult time, or those who are suffering from an illness.  There’s no question about it, some toxic people are genuinely distressed, depressed, or even mentally and physically ill, but you still need to separate their legitimate issues from how they behave toward you.  If you let people get away with anything because they are distressed, facing a medical condition, or depressed, even, then you are making it too tempting for them to start unconsciously using their unfortunate circumstance as a means to an end."

I found this tidbit on a random blog I was reading. It is private, so I can't link to it but I agree wholeheartedly. 

I love my in-laws so dearly, but sometimes giving this toxic person her way to keep the peace is a huge injustice to the rest of the family. I am on a the sideline of a battle that is not ending well. I see ways that Dan, Ben, David, and all the grandkids are losing time and attention over one person. Heavenly Father told Nephi, "It is better that one perish, than to have a whole nation dwindle in unbelief." 

I understand that she has some setbacks and disadvantages, but she knows right from wrong and how to manipulate people to get what she wants. Not cool.

Here are a handful of quotes we found at LDS.org.

The Canker of Contention

RUSSELL M. NELSON

As we dread any disease that undermines the health of the body, so should we deplore contention, which is a corroding canker of the spirit. I appreciate the counsel of Abraham Lincoln, who said: “Quarrel not at all. No man resolved to make the most of himself can spare time for personal contention. … Better give your path to a dog than be bitten by him.”

No Time for Contention

MARVIN J. ASHTON

From the Savior’s words we learn the source of contention, whether it be in the home, in the community, among the leaders, or in the classroom. “For verily, verily, I say unto you, he that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, who is the father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another.” (3 Ne. 11:29.) This means that Satan has power over us only when we let him in. We have agency. We can choose our behavior. The Prophet Joseph Smith said on one occasion, “The devil has no power over us only as we permit him. The moment we revolt at anything which comes from God, the devil takes power.” (Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, p. 181.)

When one considers the bad feeling and the unpleasantness caused by contention, it is well to ask, “Why do I participate?” If we are really honest with ourselves, our answers may be something like: “When I argue and am disagreeable, I do not have to change myself. It gives me a chance to get even.” “I am unhappy and I want others to be miserable too.” “I can feel self-righteous. In this way I get my ego built up.” “I don’t want others to forget how much I know!”

Whatever the real reason, it is important to recognize that we choose our behavior. At the root of this issue is the age-old problem of pride. “Only by pride cometh contention.” (Prov. 13:10.)

If Satan can succeed in creating in us habits of arguing, quarreling, and contention, it is easier then for him to bind us with the heavier sins which can destroy our eternal lives. A contentious spirit can affect almost any phase of our lives. An angry letter written in haste can haunt us—sometimes for years. A few ill-advised words spoken in hate can destroy a marriage or a personal friendship, or impede community progress.

Eliminating Contention

BY A. LAVAR THORNOCK

Satan seeks to sow contention everywhere, including the Church. The person with a contentious spirit is usually thinking primarily of himself. And when we yield to such a spirit we separate ourselves further from the Spirit of God. “He that hath the spirit of contention is not of me,” said the Lord, “but is of the devil, who is the father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another” (3 Ne. 11:29).

When we learn to overcome contention, in our lives we bring ourselves closer to Christ. Contention destroys relationships between family members, and thwarts the smooth progress of the Church. But as we learn the gospel, repent of our mistakes, and live in obedience to the counsel of our living prophets, we can overcome contention and begin again to progress back to God. When we, through the Atonement and self-mastery, rise above the natural man, we will be able to begin to live eternal laws. And thus will come eternal blessings.

Here are some thoughts from some of our friends: Most of which just confirmed what we already felt-

“We all have those people. Wish there was an easy answer. Just trust your instincts as a father & husband and know that Heavenly Father will guide you to do what is best for the family He has given you to lead and guide.”

“If they really wanted a relationship with their nephew, they wouldn't treat his parents poorly”

“We only spend time with them at family gatherings, but never outside of that. It just wasn't worth the hurt feelings all of the time and we know nothing will ever change.”

“If they really want a relationship with the nephews. This person needs to change or you can go surround your family with positive people who will enrich your life. I would tell this person that you won't be visiting them or let your kids visit them or this person will poison them with gossip and hatred. I wouldn't want that for my kids. Unless they change and respect everyone in your family, you don’t want them be a part of your life. It's their choice. Your Heavenly Father can also guide you. We are all his children. We love them but don't need to allow our hearts or minds to be filled with negative and toxic things.”

‪”Daniel, this is a tough one but honestly, if you don't want to be around this family member, do you want Cam?? I know I wouldn't want my daughter. Cherish, Cameron and you are a package deal. Be kind when you speak to this person and let them know that their behavior doesn't work for you and your family and that you choose not to be around the negativity. Let them know that changes need to be made in order to have that relationship they want. They can't argue that. Like another person said, let your father instinct kick in. They're there for a reason. You're the head of your family and do what you think is best. Good Luck!”

“I would give the extended family thing a rest. Go visit individual siblings and your parents at different times rather than at family gatherings and only see the people that are positive influences in your life. That way Cameron still gets to know his family but you are controlling the situation. At some point if the negative nellie makes some life changes you can go back to the family gathering thing. I would say you might have to make exceptions for some holidays though and on those days set a time limit (i.e. stay for only an hour). Good luck!”

Hopefully a little bit of healthy space will calm this person down. It is time for a reality check, and we are trying to do our part as pleasing to our Father in Heaven as we can. 

February and March can just suck it.

{sigh} When it rains, it pours. I will probably seem snarky and whiny in this post. Having a sick kid sucks. Having a very sick kid that doesn't sleep makes it seem that I am living through the apocolypse.
Yesterday after Cameron's MRI, he was cranky, cuddly, and loopy. The day before he had a high fever, over 102, so I took him in to get checked to make sure he could go forward with the MRI. Well, there was no obvious reason for his fever Thursday, so on with the tests we went.

Let me randomly throw in that we took him to the doctor 4 out of 7 days this week. (UGH)

Cameron seemed to be fine until Friday night. His fever returned, he broke out in a terrible rash, and he didn't drink anything hardly at all since his MRI, and hadn't eaten for 2 days. After he had gone over 16 hours without a single wet diaper, and 3 hours miserably crying inconsolably, Dan and I decided that his fever and our circumstances warranted a 1:00am visit to the ER.

After examining this miserable boy, the ER doc diagnosed him with Coxsackies Virus. Otherwise known as Hand, Foot, and Mouth Disease. I have no idea where on earth he picked this up, but it has been a miserable 48 hours. They wanted to avoid an IV so they mixed up a magical little potion called Magic Mouth Wash- Maalox, Benadryl, and Lidocaine, to numb his mouth. He has blistering sores all over his diaper area, hands, and feet, and rash all over his body, his fever, and major sores in his mouth. No wonder he won't eat or drink eh!?
After letting the magic mouthwash kick in, he drank a few ounces of juice and they sent us home with a prescription for the magic potion.
He crashed after he finally got comfortable all loaded up on the mouthwash and motrin.

Needless to say, Dan and I are EXHAUSTED.

The ENT verdict

Cameron saw the ENT today. She put a scope in his nose to check his adenoids and checked his tonsils. She said that they were mildly enlarged, but not enough to do surgery. She explained that at his age the surgery would be difficult, and that based on the sleep study showing that there is no obstruction, but rather a central brain pause, there was no need to do surgery at this time. I am so grateful for that. She said that definitely to move forward with the MRI- they will look at why his brain pauses. She said that sometimes babies are born with a dysfunction or abnormality that doesn't affect cognition, IQ, motor development, but will affect more primal functions- breathing/sleeping, etc. Without going into tons of detail especially since it isn't her specialty, she told us this about what could be going on with Cam, and that the scan will look for this. She said there are many possibilities.
She also said based on our visit that it sounds like we need to be more aggressive about his reflux treatment and definitely get him in to the GI docs. Their wait list is long, but hopefully they will call us with a sooner appointment if someone cancels.

In the meantime, Cameron is going through a stage where he drinks and eats things- just so he can spit them out. Gross. But true to little boys and toddlers, he finds it a funny game!

Jaxson is so cute with Cam, and Cam loves Jaxson. Jax is always patting his cheeks and kissing his head. He always wants to hold Cameron, but it won't be too long until Cam catches up in weight! Jax is a light weight!

Sleep Study

All my medical training, experience, and technical knowledge of what was going to happen just could not prepare me for the trauma it would cause my own son.
It was so upsetting to watch him get so upset and not understand why he was being tied down and hooked up.
I just about lost it, but I was able to hold my cool long enough for him to be hooked up and fall asleep.
Dan came home and was so upset about it that he couldn't sleep.
I was really stressed out about this because I knew that they would need 4-6 hours to analyze findings- but I was set at ease slightly when we arrived and I found out it didn't have to be 4-6 hours straight, just 4-6 hours total.
Well, it was a really rough night. Cameron fell asleep around 9:30- but slept really fitfully and restlessly until 12:30- he had woke up 3 times, and then I finally gave him some warm milk at 12:30am, and he was out! He finally fell into a good sleep pattern from then through 3:30- the respiratory tech over his study had to come in because one of his leads was unhooked, and she couldn't find where- unfortunately looking woke him up- and the frustration for her, Cam, and I, was that it wasn't even unhooked on him, but on the machine and he didn't need to be disturbed. How would she know without checking though?
Anyway, I tried for a long time to get him back to sleep, and I succeeded, until I put him back in the crib, then he just would not sleep, only play. We gave it a good effort, and decided to just unhook him an hour and a half early.
I think they got 4-5 hours, it will be cutting it close. Amber- our tech- I really liked her- said that if they didn't get enough hours, they will let us know and try to reschedule for as soon as possible, otherwise we will follow up with the sleep specialist in about 2 weeks.

After much deliberation, tears shed by all 3 of us over all the trauma that was this study, we won't repeat it. So I really hope and pray they got the info they need to help my son!

Here he is getting hooked all up!

All upset, but done and ready for bed-

While sleeping-

All done and unhooked- his poor skin reacted to the adhesive.

On the car ride back home, Amber our tech sent him home with a monkey blanket souvenir.

The pediatrician's verdict….

Well- the good news is that we have it narrowed down to 3 possibilities. The bad news, we have 3 possibilities!

1. A terrible, nasty, awful habit from dealing with reflux that has since resolved, and he happens to just be super stubborn. Super stubborn.

2. Silent reflux- he still could have reflux, but he doesn't spit up much anymore- so basically heartburn bothering him.

3. A sleeping disorder. YIKES!

At this point, the pediatrician wants to make sure it isn't a medical problem that needs intervention- #2 or #3.
We have a referral to see a sleep specialist- I currently keep playing phone tag with the specialist's nurse to get him scheduled.

Dan and I kind of lean toward #2- Sometimes he still has issues in the day with it.
I am definitely going to keep posted about the progress and hopefully we can get some answers. In the meantime, Cameron is cute as ever- and we are doing our best to get by!!

Springtime is around the corner-

Thank heavens for springtime! We have been cooped up for far too long! This week we have had unseasonably warm weather- not that I am complaining- quite the opposite! We got out in the yard and did some spring clean up. We also got some early hardy plants in the ground and in pots. Our daffodils are sprouting up- if we don't cool down too much they will bloom by the end of next week. We had 2 days that were in the mid 70's!! We are supposed to cool back down to normal- mid to upper 50's. But- winter is about over and the sunshine is very welcome!

Cameron enjoyed being outside and working with us- well, sleeping while we worked. That poor boy has it super rough though.
I have tried so hard to do what is known as a "combination schedule/routine" to try and get some reliability to our days; however, I have been extremely unsuccessful. As if the colic wasn't enough, Cameron started projectile vomiting everything he ate. On top of the vomiting, he got thrush- a severe case that interfered with his eating and self soothing because he wouldn't take a pacifier. I have had thrush as an adult- it is MISERABLE! We took him to see the pediatrician friday. He was diagnosed with severe reflux on top of his gas and colic, and had to be put on a maintenance prescription of zantac twice a day- which helps his spit up to not be acidic; however, it won't necessarily reduce the amount he spits up. We are supposed to watch him. Spit up is normal, projectile vomiting-not. Also, he is really putting weight on fine- he was 8.11 pounds! And as long as he continues to grow, he will outgrow the reflux. I gave up on nursing. My milk was so low- just not enough, and with the reflux, the only thing he was keeping even remotely down was similac sensitive formula with rice cereal to thicken it. I am so disappointed that I couldn't go longer. I guess 5 weeks is better than nothing.
For the thrush, we give him tylenol, and he got a prescription of diflucan- which any woman who has had a yeast infection knows works wonders so quickly.
I had to document how mad he was- poor guy was so miserable yesterday. You can even see how bad his thrush was in his mad picture! He has been so miserable that when he fell asleep, he had a message for his woes. Kiss my @$$. He gets that naughty rebel behavior from me.
Today was so much better. We even went bowling! He was a complete angel!

Tyler, Kristen, and Jax went bowling with us. It was super fun! By the time we were finished, Cam started to get fussy cause he was tired. Jaxson held him, and calmed him down. It is the cutest thing to hear a 3 year old say, "You are alright buddy!" and try to rock him! 

And just because he is cute having play time....